Monday, July 28, 2014

Makeup Monday- DIY Fiber Lash Primer

So you know those mascaras that come with the extra tube of a white primer that is supposed to make your lashes appear like, twice as long and thick? Well they actually do work...some of them at least. What they do is contain tiny white fibers that adhere to your lashes, thus extending them a bit and thickening them as they stick. And then when you apply the actual mascara, the mascara adheres to the white primer instead of just your bare lashes, making this fake lash effect occur. It's a pretty genius idea.

But...they can get expensive. AND in my experience, the mascaras that come with the primer are never as good as my L'Oreal Voluminous + Telescopic Shocking Extensions combo I'm forever sworn to.  Plus, who needs another tube of something crowding up their makeup drawer?! (I certainly DO NOT.) 

So...I created my own DIY version of that same idea that will produce the same result (if not a better one) and it won't cost you any extra money.  I don't do this all the time, in fact- I can't remember the last time I did it... But it's a super cool trick to keep in your back pocket.  

You ready?  OK. Here we go. 

All you need is an eyelash curler (optional), your favorite mascara (or two ;-), a lash comb (optional), a loose powder of some sort and a Q-tip. And it honestly doesn't matter all that much what kind of powder you use, I've used the old school loose face powder, I've used pressed powder, the new silica-based HD loose powders...I've even used baby powder. They all work just fine, but I prefer using the HD loose powder because it isn't as thick and doesn't clog your mascara wand like the others can with overuse. So in today's demo, I'm using my favorite e.l.f. Studio High Definition Powder that I use for setting the concealer under my eyes. 




If you're curling your lashes, do so first- in your favorite manner. I actually don't like curling mine because my lashes are so very fine that they break easily. But today I took one for the team and curled them for you so you get the full demo.

Because that's how much I love you.




And then after you curl them (if you chose to do so) you're just putting a very light coat of mascara on your top lashes (in my case I began with the Voluminous), immediately dusting them with a heavy coating of loose powder using a Q-tip, and then following up with another coat (or two) of mascara until you get the results you like (I did another (full) coat of Voluminous + one of the Shocking Extensions). And separating them with the comb if need be.

The idea is that you first coat your lashes lightly with some mascara and while they're still wet, you add the powder which sticks to them and coats them.  You really wanna coat them good with the powder, like down at the base, on the tops and bottoms, and on the tips- just drag the powdered Q-tip all over those lashes.  And then you use a full coat of mascara on top of the powder, which immediately thickens and lengthens them.  You can really see it working immediately...it's quite exciting.

It.  Is.  So.  Easy.



(Oh, and just so you know- In addition to the obvious fact that my hair is messily thrown back and I'm wearing an old t-shirt, I'm not wearing any other makeup on my face in these photos, (not even bottom lash mascara, which is super weird to look at).  I did that so you're able to focus solely on the idea behind this post and not get distracted by pretty, shiny and sparkly things.  (Again, the things I do for you guys....)




But you can see how they really do look fuller and longer. This is the best trick I know to get that false eyelash look without the false lashes.  It's so easy AND cheap!! 




So that's it for today!  Thanks for listening and have a happy Monday, y'all!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

...aaaaaand that was gonna be the end of the post. But then I took my lashes out for the evening and put on a whole face to match (plus one more mascara coat just for fun), and thought I would share the potential trouble you can get into when you use this trick...




Now, that's a LOT of lash...even for me.  So, you've been warned!!! 





(at least you and I both know they're 100% real ;-)

Sunday, July 27, 2014

...One Is Silver And The Other Gold

Last week I talked about Friends- about making new ones and trying to fit them into your grown-up life, about keeping the old ones who have known you forever... (reminds me of that Girl Scout song, 'Make new friends, but keep the old...')  And today, I find myself talking about them again.  Well, one friend in particular.  And this one friend I have known since the 6th grade.  She's my goofball friend, the one with whom I can laugh at any occasion (appropriate or not), the one to whom I can say incredibly inappropriate things and she wouldn't bat an eyelash, the one with whom I have gotten into tiny amounts of (innocent) trouble many, many times in the past...

She and I went for a long run yesterday morning, stopped at the Farmer's Market so I could buy a couple things for dinner, and on our way back through Davidson, we decided to stop at my parent's house.  But before we got there, we decided we needed to visit an old hideout we hadn't been to in, oh...15 years or so.  I won't name the exact location, but any of you local Davidsonians who knew me/us back when we were teens probably know the spot pretty well...  Let's just say in order to get to this hideout spot, some climbing is involved...it may or may not be the rooftop of a local building.  And the last time we did the climbing we were teenagers, and our point of entry wasn't dilapidated and overgrown with poison ivy and cobwebs like it is now.  But, you can't stop us when we decide we're doing something.  So after initially staring at the wall and the roof and trying to Spiderman our way up there, then trying to stack one rotten tree stump on top of another rotten tree stump to use as a step stool, my brilliant plan was to have her stand on my back and then hoist herself up...which she did.  Then we realized I had to get up there too.  So she, sitting on top of the roof, pretty much inside of an overgrown tree, found an air vent to grab ahold of, and reached out her leg for me to use as a handle.

'Just grab onto my foot and pull yourself up!'

'OK!' 

...said the 13 year old me.

I grabbed onto her flexed foot, she grabbed onto that air vent, and I pulled myself up with sweaty knees and forearms.  And once I got to the top, we both stood up and squealed like the children we used to be, did a little dance and took it all in- the view from up there felt familiar.  It felt both peaceful and exiting all at the same time.  I looked down at her leg.

'(gasp) You're bleeding!!!'

She looked down at mine.

'(gasp)  You are too!!!"

...in unison-

'We're bleeding!!!!"

(laughter.  lots and lots of laughter)

We walked over to our old spot and sat down.  We were a little out of breath, a lot excited, and a lot happy.  We decided we needed to take pictures.  This place was about to be torn down and we knew it would be our last chance to relive these memories.  So I opened up the camera timer I have on my iPhone and looked for a place to prop it up.  This part took about 15 minutes- us trying to figure out how to properly prop my phone up in a gutter, have me push the button and then get into position (up on a roof, mind you), all within the 5 seconds the timer gave me to do so.  There are A LOT of outtakes from that...

this is merely one of them.



But we finally got the shot we wanted, and made sure to get one of our banged up legs.


We were proud of those scrapes, we were wearing those like battle wounds....we didn't even mind the moderate stinging sensation that was happening considering we were also still quite sweaty from our run.

My parents showed up a little later (I won't tell you how they knew we were up there...that would surely incriminate us) and my mom began taking pictures. 



Look at those two.  Thirty two and Thirty three years old, up on a roof, laughing like children, high on life and memories.  


"Don't let go!  (laughter) Don't YOU let go!!"

We didn't wanna leave.  We were having the time of our lives up there on that roof, that place where we used to spend hours and hours of our time as children.  We secretly scaled that wall and did our homework up there on that roof, we wrote songs up there, we laughed and probably even cried up there on that roof.  We stared at clouds and stars, we talked about boys and life and how being best friends was the most important thing in the world.  And what's interesting is that most of that hasn't changed.  Up there on that roof yesterday, we talked about boys, we talked about life, we sang our song, we laughed and probably even cried up there on that roof.  We are older now, both of us thought silently.  We are older and wiser now, up here on this roof, breaking the rules, but doing it for the best reason in the world- for friendship.  For a bond that cannot be broken.

When I called my friend to come run with me early yesterday morning, I only knew I wanted to see her.  What I didn't know is what the morning would turn into.  And now, I feel as though we went into battle together and came out stronger and happier...with the wounds to prove it.

Then...

...It's all fun and games (and poetic) until you realize you have to get back down again.

We considered camping out up there for awhile, just sort of making it our home...but then we thought our families may miss us (we had momentarily forgotten that we were, in fact, mothers and not teenagers...that's the power of a good, old friendship).  So my mom (and the family pit bull) stood there in the yard, trying to convince us to find a way to climb down, like we did to get up...but we knew what we had to do-we knew we had to go for it.  We looked at each other, that mischeivious glimmer we both get in our eyes before we know something awesome is about to happen, and we knew we needed to go old school.  We knew we needed a proper 13 year old dismount.

On the count of three...



Tuck and roll, baby.  Tuck and roll.  

It was some of the most fun I have had in a long time.  It was an incredible rush.  It felt like old times, up there on that roof.  We just sat up there in the silence, looking at the sky, looking at the trees and the flowers, and forgot about anything and everything else that we had going on in our lives.  We didn't think about our schedules or our work, or the people who depended on us for things, we were just...US.  

That's the beauty of a good friendship.  You can go days, weeks, months, years without seeing one another and once you finally do again, whether you're on solid ground or a wonky, abandoned rooftop, you slip right back into your old selves again.  And now we'll have the scars to prove it...and possibly the poison ivy.


Make new friends, but keep the old.  One is silver and the other gold.  
A circle is round, it has no end.  That's how long I will be your friend.  
A fire burns bright, it warms the heart. We've been friends from the very start.
You have one hand, I have the other.  Put them together, we have each other...
Across the land, across the sea.  Friends forever we will always be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And here's the recipe I made using some of the stuff I got from the Farmer's Market yesterday...it's so simple, but a perfect way to showcase the edible beauty that summer brings.


*Peach Caprese Salad with Tarragon
Shown here as a part of our dinner last night- Roasted Chicken Legs and Blistered Corn...and a glass (or two) of 2013 Christian Salmon Sancerre 

This can barely be called a recipe, it's just about combining certain ingredients to make them something magical, but it is so good that you will want to make it all the time this summer- when the peaches and tomatoes are sweet and juicy, and the herbs are as vibrant as the sun.

All you do is layer or stack thick slices of ripe peaches (any variety), tomatoes (any variety or size) and fresh mozzarella, then add a few basil leaves and sprinkle with finely chopped tarragon.  Drizzle with the best extra virgin olive oil you have, season with flaky sea salt and freshly cracked black pepper... And eat!!! 

Friday, July 25, 2014

Fashion Friday...Bras and Backless

I went out last Friday night to a concert with two of my good friends.  We went to The Evening Muse to hear Jason Scavone and The Hot Gates play- one of my new favorite bands. It was a great night, (a late one) but a great one.  They sounded amazing and I felt so honored to have been able to hear them live, do so with close friends, and get to meet Jason.  But that's not the point of today.  Today is Friday and on Fridays we talk fashion.  So for today's Fashion Friday post I decided to talk about the little fashion dilemma I ran into with my outfit that evening...because I think it's something that many of us can relate to.
(Surely I can't be the only one...)

OK so, we're talking bras today.  (Ya'll are starting to get to know me a little too well...)  Bras, just like the body parts they work for, come in all shapes and sizes.  And thank goodness for that, because so do female clothing.  Those of us with, um, small bras still run into trouble now and then.  Because, at the end of the day- those body parts are all essentially the same thing and all need to be concealed in the same way...it just may take more fabric and structure to conceal some compared to others.  (Like, for me- a band-aid usually can do the trick.)  But sometimes a normal bra (or band-aid) just doesn't agree with an outfit, and you have to be pretty creative to make it work.

I had purchased this adorable, white eyelet (backless) top last week (at Marshall's) and knew I wanted to wear it to the concert.  I had my outfit all planned out- I was wearing it with jeans and heels.  Done.  Then 30 minutes before I needed to leave- makeup done, otherwise ready to go- I slipped on the shirt and went to give myself a final look.  Then realized I had a real problem on my hands.  The shirt had holes from the design in the front...right along the bust, and was completely backless, therefore making it quite difficult to find a bra that looked good enough.  I tried a lot of different things- all of which exposed the bra in the back...it was a real process.  Some sweating may have been involved...  So this morning I recreated all the steps I took when trying to find the perfect bra to wear with the imperfectly perfect top.

Here we go...

Standard nude, strapless bra.
This one was fine in the front.  You couldn't see a thing, it had perfect coverage...only, I just didn't like how it looked like an accident in the back.  Like, I had gotten dressed and forgot you could see my business back there.  So I went on to the next idea...

White standard bra with lace detail.  
I didn't mind this one that much because (even though white bra with white shirt is usually a no-no), it matched the shirt so...it kinda looked more uniform.  But still- I thought I could do better.

Then I went blue.  I went shocking, teal blue. 
My thought was- let's just go crazy so it was completely obvious that I was making a conscious decision to show that bra.  I was making a bold fashion statement.  I didn't hate it but... I didn't like how the blue messed with the white, sweetness of the top in the front.  

There had to be a better way...


Aha!  Then I remembered I had one of those backless, nude sticky bra thingies!!
Perfect!  It has silicone sticky tabs on the sides that adhere to your skin right under the arm area.  I had never worn it before but knew it was the right choice.

Hooray! Nothing visible from the front, sides or back. Sweet.

(early morning bath tub rim shot...totally fancy)
So, here's the verdict on the bra (from Target)-  There are a lot of rules that come with this baby.  You must make sure there is no lotion or perfume of any kind on the skin where you will be placing the sticky tabs, or else it won't stick.  Also- be sure to be quite sure where you are placing the tabs as you place them...a lot of undoing and re-sticking can result in a loose bond.  And, here's the part that scared me the most- There's an expiration time on it.  Like, for real.  On the box it says to only wear for 4-6 hours.  It doesn't say what will happen at 6:01 but my brain went to crazy places- There would be some sort of Inspector Gadget style explosion and disappearance of the bra and I would be left sad and exposed on the dance floor.  So you better believe I was checking the time every 30 minutes and doing quick math in my head.  I also had my friend on boob-duty.  She knew that if she saw something slip from across the bar, we were to run into the bathroom and perform surgery.  I also came prepared with back-ups (forever a Girl Scout, I am).  In my purse, I had with me back-up #1- a pack of silicone pasties (also from Target) and back-up #2 (you must always have a back-up for the back-up, that's just common sense, ya'll)- another shirt.  A less temperamental top that would save the day if need be.  (I know what you're all thinking- why not just wear that one in the first place, crazy?! Because I do not like easy.  I like temperamental.  Plus I'm stubborn as hell.)

But here's the thing- I never needed any of my back-ups!  That bra stayed put all night.  I did have it on for the 4-6 hours, so I suppose it better have stayed put!  But now I'm a little bit curious as to what really would happen...I'm considering tempting fate next time.

Happy Friday to you all!!

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Thirsty Thursday- Salty and Sour

So, I'm an adventurous eater. There aren't many things I won't eat.

Except jarred mayonnaise. That stuff is the devil. 

Like, I would be an amazing contestant on one of those competition shows where you have to eat crazy things to stay on the island.

I would never be forced to leave the island.  I would be typing this post on that island.

I'm also an adventurous drinker. (Basically, I'll try anything. I'll do anything. I'm that person.)  I'd like to think of it as 'I have a very open mind' instead of... 'I'm crazy'... 

There's this type of beer called a Sour. And.. It's exactly like what it sounds like. It's...Sour.  Not Bitter, which is what a lot of great beers are, but actually tart and Sour. A lot of Sours get that way from the addition of fruit (usually cherries) during the aging process, which help that secondary fermentation happen. And, while most beers are brewed in a sterile environment, where wild yeasts aren't allowed to enter, Sours are givers, they don't discriminate- they welcome the wild yeasts and bacteria to come and play. And this is what creates the distinct flavor of a Sour.  (It's also what causes them to be a little better for us to drink, as consuming any sort of wild yeast is very beneficial to our guts.)

But this wild yeast action also causes the price to be pretty high. Wild yeasts are a...wild card, for lack of a better term. They can be very temperamental, as things out of our control, like climate, play a huge factor whenever you're dealing with them, and they don't always respond well or behave, so that's why beers that use them have a high price tag. (Wicked Weed is an excellent producer of Sours and you can pay around $10 for a pint-size bottle, but it's totally worth it.)

Then there's a specific German style of a Sour-wheat beer called a Gose. (Pronounced Gose-uhThe Westbrook Brewing Co. in SC is the one I'm talking about today- it has a 93% BA Rating)  It's brewed with coriander and salt. Yes, salt! It is so unbelievably interesting and cool. When you pour it into a glass, it looks like watered honey-a beautiful golden hue.  And then when you touch it to your tongue, it tastes like... a green tomato gazpacho...or sucking on a lemon wedge sprinkled with salt...or a half sour pickle- still firm and vibrant and clinging tightly onto the cucumber it once was. It's just so cool.  But if you can't really wrap your brain around the whole Sour/Salty beer thing, if I'm freaking you out a little right now then riddle me this- Why do you love a margarita so much with your chips and guac?  Why does a gatorade taste like sex feels after a 5 mile run at 4 pm in late July?  It's because you are tasting Sour mixed with salt.  And whenever you have two, otherwise conflicting flavor notes melded together, they become one harmonious taste on your tongue.  Sweet and Salty, Sweet and Sour,  Sour and Salty...they all can work together to make incredible tastebud music. There' s a lot that goes on inside those mouths that you probably aren't even aware of.  Lots of secrecy, lots of undercover stuff happening...

Get ready to be schooled, ya'll.

OK so, tastebuds are an actual, scientific thing.  Not just a made up term like cankles or restless leg syndrome.  On our tongues are visible, tiny bumps called papillae, and dispersed throughout each papillae are the taste buds- there are hundreds of them.  The things we taste can be categorized into 5 groups- Sweet, Salty, Sour, Bitter and, the new kid on the block- Umami. The cavemen inside of us immediately respond positively to Sweet and Salty- those are flavors that our tongues recognize as energy-rich foods, foods we need for survival, but the taste of Sour and Bitter immediately triggers a warning sign- it causes us to take a step back and think, 'Wait.  This isn't normal, this may be bad, this may be poison.'  So a lot of people are put off by the flavors of Sour and Bitter.  (Aw, poor Sour and Bitter.)  But that's only because poisonous plants tended to be very Bitter in flavor.  Bitter and Sour still to this day have a negative a connotation to them, we put those guys down on a regular basis- Bitter til the end, a Bitter pill to swallow, the negative counterpart to Bittersweet, Sour grapes... But that's simply not fair.  That just means we need to work a little harder to find the beauty in something that is either Bitter or Sour. They're the underdogs here, and I always root for the underdog.

Even our tongue plays favorites- Flavors that enter our mouths hit on different parts of our tongue, causing us to react to them in different ways.  When we taste something Salty or Sweet, we are doing so on the very tip and center of our tongues.  It's an easier, more recognizable flavor profile for the tongue, a more immediate taste. But when we taste something Bitter or Sour, our tongue gets it at the very back and along the sides. (and Umami takes over the whole tongue- that little hussy.)  Think about it, when you sucked on those super Sour candies as a kid, do you remember feeling it at the back of your tongue?  It almost hurt back there, didn't it?  But it felt like a challenge.  And that, my friends is what we need more of.  We need to challenge our tongues more.  (Stop it, stop it right now- you dirty minded people.)

So maybe that's what I really like about this Gose.  It's unique and different and challenging.  One sip leads to a thought and a question, which leads to another sip, and so on and so forth.  I really love this stuff. But I know I can't love it too much because it's super hard to find.  My husband and a good friend came home with a couple 6 packs the other day and they both are hoarding them.  There may be locks and keys involved.  So I've been reduced to sneaking some sips every now and then when they're not looking to scratch the itch. 

Bottom line- If you're an adventurous drinker and like the idea of trying new things, then you must give this puppy a try.  I challenge you to do so.

Your tastebuds will thank you...and maybe your cankles too.



Visit the Westbrook Brewing Co. (pictured above) for more information.  Or NoDa Brewing Company for their What Gose Round- they add ginger to theirs!

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Workout Wednesday - Upside Down For A Little While

When my husband and I lived in LA (a lifetime ago), we went to a taping of The Ellen DeGeneres show. So many things have changed since then... I had red hair, he had some... But one thing that hasn't changed is my affinity for being upside down. I don't know what it is, (perhaps the 'retired' gymnast in me) but sometimes I see a wall and I just have to get up on that piece.

The Ellen Show producers came out to the line where all the audience members were waiting and asked if any of us had any strange talents. (Uh, yeah buddy, how much time you got?)  A few people raised their hands with the talent of a foreign language, opera singing, bird calls... And little ole crimson haired me just blurted out, 

"I can do upside down handstand wall push-ups". 

No one said a word. The producer looked at me- small, kinda soft around the edges back then, and...(I'm guessing) unassuming- and shrugged before bringing me back to the 'special room'. So I was stuck in a room (not all that special) for a couple hours with several over-excited, glorified extras who were all practicing 'their talent' over and over again. (It was awesome slash the worse couple hours of my life...you know what I mean if you've ever been trapped in a small space with eager actors. Like a vampire or a shark, they can smell the blood and turn into life-sucking, hyperactive children.)

They began rolling film and it was my turn. 

"And what's you're talent?" 

"Oh. Um, I can do upside down handstand wall push-ups"

(Again with the look) 

So I found the closest wall, kicked off my heels, did a few and dismounted. 

There was some silence, followed by some clapping and some thank you's and then I just sorta walked away. (I had had a few beers by that point, as being a part of a TV taping audience takes all day, and they 'don't discourage you from getting a little sauced during your lunch break'...I'm sure it makes for a happier audience.)

And that was it. We listened to Betty White (one of my heros) give out dating advice, Steve Carell talk about getting his chest hair ripped off for the 40 Year Old Virgin and listened to the John Mayer Trio perform Who Did You Think I Was

And me? I was the small and (I'm guessing) unassuming red head who was tipsily upside down for a little while. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So today, on Workout Wednesday, I'm bringing back the upside down handstand wall push-up.  It is an incredible upper body workout.  I do as many as 15-20, but even the few I shot in the video below is enough to get the blood pumping.  It's just something I do from time to time when I wanna feel like a superhero.  Like most of my workouts, this doesn't take up much time, doesn't require any special equipment...just a wall (public or private), clothes that stay put (if you're public), and most importantly, the desire to be upside down for a little while.

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

I'll Be There For You

I had a 'Tip Tuesday' post all written out for you today.  I wrote most of it early yesterday and knew all I had to do was get up and edit it first thing this morning before sending it out.  It was about the things I like to buy at the Dollar Store.  I'm sure I'll post it one of these days, but when I woke up this morning (at 4 am...I slept in!!) I had other things on my mind.  I started to edit that Dollar Store post and it just didn't feel right.  That's the thing about being a writer with an outlet- you have to seize the opportunity to write something whenever it happens.  So I hope you don't mind me keeping my Dollar Store info away from you for a bit, and instead talking about another subject.

I woke up this morning with Friends on my mind.  (No, not the 90's television show, although now I got you all singing the song...you're welcome)-  Just the concept of Friends in general. I grew up in a small town (in which I now live again) and some of the Friends I made in preschool are still a large part of my life.  It's a beautiful thing, having a Friend that you can say you literally grew up with- a Friend who is in pictures with you at birthday parties, school assemblies, soccer games... There is a bond there that cannot be matched by any other Friend.  Since it was a small town, those preschool and elementary school Friends became junior high Friends, and then high school Friends.

Then I remember my mother telling me when I was younger that the Friends I would be meeting in college could be the ones I would have for life.  I went to college, made the Friends, (a lot of them), but I cannot name one of them that I actually still keep in touch with today.  I was friends with a lot of boys.  I was that girl who was the only chick at the frat house.  I loved it.  Loved having boy-friends.  I felt taken care of, I felt special, I felt...not-competed with... It was nice.  I had never had that before because I had previously been stuck in a controlling and manipulative relationship where jealousy played a huge factor.  Then I met some girls and for the first time since my playground days, I made new girlfriends.  Everything was great until it wasn't.  And I won't elaborate on that but I will say that I had my heart broken and it took me awhile to recover from the pain.

No-one can hurt you deeper than a woman.

I also have a Friend (a girlfriend) whom I met in junior high.  She and I clicked instantly- did everything together, lived together through college...we were a team.  We were a dynamic and epic team.  We had fun, we shared life, we laughed, we cried, we fought, we did every-thing together.  Then things happened and we drifted apart.  For 14 years we didn't speak or see one another.  Then this year-this past week to be specific- we reunited and it felt like no time had passed.  She was once a part of my soul and now I can say she's back in.  Or perhaps she never left... Yeah, I think that's how it works.  I think once you let someone in, truly let someone inside of you to see the real you- have a piece of the real you- no matter what happens, even if they walk away, they will always hold onto that piece. You may not even feel that you're missing the piece, but they have it.  And when they return, you somehow feel completed again.

But what about making new Friends?  What about meeting someone in your adult life? ...how does that work, exactly?  That's a hard one, I think.  Unless you're on some online Friends forum (is there such a thing?), it's difficult to actually meet new Friends in your adult life...especially when your job requires you to stay home.  But it can happen.  And sometimes it can happen with such strength that it can knock you off your tracks a little bit.  When you're an adult you don't have the time to waste like you did as a kid, you're forced to be a bit more picky about whom you let in, so the Friends you may meet, the ones you consider worth your time and effort, have to be something special.  They sort-of have to be soulmate material.  Because as an adult, you have baggage- good and bad, so cultivating and sustaining new friendships can be difficult.  It no longer matters anymore what you want, or who you want, because you have other people to consider in the equation.  But when you find someone who gets you, someone you feel really deserves to be let in, it's difficult to walk away.

The old saying is true- You can't choose your family, but you can choose your Friends.  But what they don't say is that sometimes you can't choose your Friends. Sometimes a person walks into your life (or back into your life) when you weren't expecting it, when you didn't even think you needed anything, and becomes a part of you.  And whether you like it or not, however hard it may be, you remain tethered to that person- even if just in the abstract.  Because that person was let inside- you let that person inside.  And therein lies the trouble.  When you let someone in, when you allow them to see your true self, your soul, and everything else you were willing to expose, letting them go is the hardest part.

Because everything happens for a reason, timing is everything, and sometimes you need to just sit back and allow life to take over.  On one hand I believe that you absolutely control your own destiny- You want something? You work hard and go get it!  But on the other hand I believe that some things are out of our control and we need to take a backseat and allow someone else to take the wheel.  (sigh) I'm not good at allowing someone else to take the wheel in my car.  I like driving.  I'm good at driving.  I feel like I know my car the best, I know what it likes, what makes it tick, what makes it run the smoothest, and plus- I get car sick if I'm not in the driver's seat (yes, I'm still using the car as a metaphor for my life here).

But as an adult, one of the hardest lessons we have to learn is that it isn't always about what you want anymore.  It isn't always about how well you can drive, it's about how safely you, and all of your baggage, can arrive at your destination.

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I decided to re-share a recipe to go along with today's post.  It felt like a comfort food type of subject today.  Because, that's the wonderful thing about food- food is a Friend I always know I can rely on.  Making food and sharing it with the people I love, like a good Friend, is something I hold so very dear to my heart and it is a part of myself that I could never give up.  And since baking is something I do whenever I feel off in some way,  whenever I perhaps am in need of a Friend, I've decided to share with you one of my pie recipes- written almost exactly 2 years ago when (clearly, according to the post content), I was in dire need of a Friend.

Blackberry and Peach Butter Pie

And while we're on the subject of pastry (one of my favorite subjects), here's the link to a post with my pie-making videos to help you with your next pie!


As always, thanks for listening.  Go hug a Friend and enjoy your Tuesday!