We all have things that make us weird. I’m not alone in this. (Please tell me I’m not alone in this.) Do you ever think about your weird things? I do. That’s how I know I’m not clinically insane- because I’m aware of my idiosyncrasies. I’ve thought about my weirdness a lot this week, actually. I’ve been talking to my girlfriends about taking a beach trip this summer, and it entered my head that we all haven’t had a sleepover since were were in single digits. And maybe I was a weirdo then, but I started to wonder if I would end up being like the hairy lady at the circus- all of them standing around and wondering what they were looking at. For instance, I get up in the morning and immediately require a simple carb, something soft and sinful, my Potato Sourdough Bread is my usual, but it’s been fresh butter croissants, Coconut Scones, birthday cake… I eat it first thing or I’m cranky. And then I demand my coffee. Diesel fuel, no sugar, with a small shot of half&half. Then I work out. I do this every single morning of my life. I’m an early riser so a lot of this is done when it’s still dark outside and no one is looking, judging.
I eat the same thing every day, at the same time. I don’t have, like, a written down chart for it, (that would be crazy!), but I’m pretty much a workhorse. I also prefer baths over showers. And drinking (never eating) in bed, over anywhere else in the house. I prefer to not wear pants whenever possible. Or normal people clothes, unless I’m planning on seeing a lot of people, in which case I go all out. I stash a toothbrush and toothpaste in all possible places I could need them- purse, car, guest bathroom(s)…I can’t stand the feeling of coffee on my teeth (it could be turning them brown right now!!). I talk to myself. Sometimes. Not a lot.
I also become an 8 year old when it comes to bedtime. I can pass out on a weeknight before 9 pm, no problem. I have to sleep on the side of the bed closest to the bathroom (because I’m also secretly a 74 year old man.) I have to be the first person in the room, alone, in order to fall asleep- Or else I become too aware that someone else is in there and may possibly already be asleep before me, which makes me angry and sad. And I require a pillow to be placed in between my legs, to support my lower back when I sleep, and I sleep on my left side.
But besides all of that, I’m totally normal.
So if something gets in the way of any of those things, I get thrown off my game…and in the case of today, I almost mean that literally.
Yesterday I suffered an injury that doesn’t even seem possible to explain. I was running upstairs in my house, at full speed, to get my son’s school clothes I had forgotten to get out the night before. I was in my gym clothes and about to head out the door. So I made a sprint for it, probably skipping steps along the way, and as I turned left to enter the hallway, I cut in a little too early apparently and ran my left hip smack into the banister, and it knocked me down. I fell to the floor, couldn’t move or speak for a good 2 minutes, husband and children around me, staring, making me feel a little like that hairy lady. I tried to perform some sort of mime to let them in on the details, they had no idea what had just happened to me, but I’m pretty sure moans were all they heard. I finally was able to get up and assess the damage- probably just a bone bruise. It hurt like hell but I could move…not well, but it was possible. I took a handful of ibuprofen, grabbed a squishy ice pack and headed on to the gym…(workhorse, remember?)
When it came time to sleep last night, I got under the sheets, (the clock read something like 8:50…) and as I laid down in my coveted sleep position, a sharp pain rushed down my leg.
Oh, right. Left side sleep, left side hurt, Crap.
I eventually fell asleep but woke up in pain at 2:45 and have been awake since. So, knowing what you know about me thus far you now know that I ate breakfast at 2:50 a.m. and finished my coffee by 3:10. Good morning, everyone!
But I figured, since I’m awake I may as well get some work done. I actually prefer to be the first one awake in the house. It’s the only time I have alone and I cherish it. It allows me to get all those crazy thoughts out, do all my weird stuff without any questions from the peanut gallery. So…I decided to write. About what? Well…so far it’s been things that have probably scared you, but I can write about other stuff too. Like, have you noticed anything different about my site? Are you on my site? Maybe my words came to you in a magical box from the email fairy, maybe you’re looking at my mobile version. In which case, I’ll wait while you exit out and go to my website. I’ll wait.
You there? Good. See anything different? Look up at the web address field. Look at that! I’m a www now! Aren’t I fancy?! No more .blogspot.com I’ve entered the big leagues, people.
www.MyEverydayChampagne.com is my new home. And I likey. I likey a lot.
Cool, right? My site has expanded and grown so much in the past year and I’m just thrilled and proud that I was able (ahem, my husband was able) to make this happen. Nothing has changed except for the address. So, if you’re someone who isn’t on the mailing list (why not? do it now!! -I’ll wait again), and is used to typing in the address everyday (thanks for that, by the way), then remember this:
Also remember that I am aware that I’m a little crazy, that’s very important for you to understand. But also remember that you are too.