OK. I need to set a couple things straight. There are a few things that I feel I need to get off my chest- things I’ve been holding onto and debating over whether or not I should actually say anything about. I suppose I hoped the issue would fix itself, that there would be no need for clarification on my part, but it has now come to the point that I can no longer sit back and allow anyone to take something that I hold dear to my heart and just trample on it out of ignorance. It has become a problem- a big, messy, unnecessary problem. There are many people out there, right this very second, who are walking around thinking false truths, and I now fear more people are going to get hurt if I don’t take a stand and speak my Truth. I’ve sat on this for far too long. And now, simply because I know in my heart it’s the right thing to do, I, personally am going to set the damn record straight. Once and for all.
There’s no turning back now. I understand that and accept the reprocussions that may come from this. I only hope that you all understand that it is coming from a place of sheer and utter frustration at this point, but also from a place of Kindness. I am a kind person, please know that about me if you don’t already. And I wish that more people would be the same, I wish more people would go forth in life with Kindness as their priority above anything else. Remember that many of you know me- the real me. Many of you reading this right now have watched me grow up. You know me and my family, or perhaps you are, in fact, my family. So you should know that anything I would say or do should and would come from a place of Kindness. Check your facts before you start spreading information that isn’t true, know that hitting send on that email, or that tweet, or finishing the last lines of that whisper in the office break room then puts you personally responsible for someone’s feelings and, in this particular case, their health. Because, this my friends, my family, has gone way too far.
If you are attempting to follow Jillian Michael’s ‘detox water’ ‘recipe’- the one with the lemon juice and the cranberry juice and the dandelion tea, then PLEASE LISTEN TO ME RIGHT THIS SECOND. (I am tired of Pinterest getting this screwed up for all of you.) When you read, ‘Real or Fresh Lemon Juice’ in the recipe, (in ANY recipe), that means take a damn lemon and squeeze it. DO NOT take a green bottle of neon yellow liquid that reads ‘Real’ or ‘Fresh’ on the label and pour, because the fact that it is coming from a bottle should very well indicate that it is neither one of those things. When you read, ‘No Sugar Added, Real Cranberry Juice’ or ‘100% Pure Cranberry Juice‘ in the recipe, that means find the bottle of the stuff that is, in fact, ALL (which is what 100% means, by the way) cranberry juice, NOT the cocktail, which is full of added sugar, NOT the 100% juice that is actually apple juice with a splash of cranberry added so they can call it 100% juice, and above all else, NOT THE STUFF THAT CONTAINS ARTIFICIAL SWEETENERS. You are looking for 100% CRANBERRY JUICE…meaning the label should only have 1 ingredient listed. It’s there, I assure you. That 100% Pure Cranberry Juice, or Just Cranberry Juice– it’s there at the supermarket. You just have to look for it…top shelf, above the big, plastic bottles of the cheap and commercial stuff.
No part of a ‘detox’ or ‘cleanse’ should ever involve anything artificial. Or processed. So knowing that simple fact right there can help you out tremendously in the future. Sugar=not too good. Artificial Sugar Replacements=so so bad. And also know, while we’re on the subject, that ‘losing 7 pounds in 5 days’ by drinking juice, or in this case ‘water’, is not going to be permanent. Do it if you desire, I’m not saying don’t, but know that it is short term. Know that whatever weight you are losing is not fat. It is water. And that water will come back. If you want to lose weight- actual body weight made up of fat- if you are overweight and unhealthy and unhappy about it- there is no magic drink. There are no magic pills, there is no book that you need to waste any more of your hard-earned money on. It is simple math-
Burn more calories than you are ingesting. And move around more. Eat things that occur in nature more so than things that are wrapped in plastic. Drink more water than things that are colored. And break a sweat doing something that makes your heart pump and brain feel alive. It is simple, it is natural and it is the only thing you need to succeed in your pursuit of a happier body. Do not think of it in terms of size. Do not compare your body to someone else’s. What you have is beautiful. What you have is unique. What you have is yours. Think of it in terms of happiness. If your body is unhappy, make it happy. When was the last time your body was happy? Was it when you were a child? Why? Because you were carefree and you played. You weren’t concerned with its size or shape. You moved around more and you played. Let us go back to that place- the place, the playground where we played and were happy, and kind and true. And never forget to look within. A good body, a happy body begins with a good heart and mind and soul. Once you decide that you will change, once you tell yourself that it is time to change, your body will follow. I promise you. Look within. Always, always, look within. The answers to anything you shall ever need are always within you. You just need to take a second to remember who you are.
And whether it’s water or some television trainer’s ‘recipe’ for ‘water’, drink a cup of it mindfully and with Kindness and Truth in your heart. Only then can you be the best version of yourself.
Ahh…I feel so much better. I truly do. Thank you for listening.
Wait. What did you think I was talking about?